WE BECOME USED TO “FENDING” THEM OFF.
For the last week I’ve been heartbroken and in awe about allegations surrounding Harvey Weinstein.
Heartbroken, because so many women have been scarred for life and scared to speak up about a man in power.
And for those that did speak up or said NO they were often ignored or it hurt their career.
In awe, because finally, FINALLY, F-I-N-A-L-L-Y, influential women (and a tiny sprinkle of men) are speaking up on what most women have had happen at some point in their career, and that is, as Emma Thompson says an “endemic” culture of sexual harassment.
The sad thing is we are not just dealing with one man.
We are opening up (once again) the conversation about the ABUSE OF POWER!
Having worked in the TV commercial production and advertising industries for over 10 years, starting in my 20s as a sales rep, I saw a lot of stuff that my young eyes should not have seen.
Thankfully I was never alone in a hotel room with someone who forced me into anything…
However, I can’t count on my two hands the amount of times powerful married men with children who were much (MUCH!) older than me HIT ON (or sexually harassed) me or my women friends in the industry (without us asking for it) in FULL VIEW of other people.
WE BECOME USED TO “FENDING” THEM OFF.
In the TV commercial production and advertising industries, SADLY, there is an acceptable culture for men to cheat, sexually harass, and take advantage of women 20-30 years younger than themselves, simply because they are in some sort of powerful position within the industry.
Among ourselves, we women would speak about the disgust we had with the culture in the industry, but with so many of the same type of people in power, how do you speak up, when 85% of them at the top are probably guilty of some form of abuse of power?!
WE BECOME USED TO “FENDING” THEM OFF.
It’s what us women have learned to do.
WE BECOME USED TO “FENDING” THEM OFF.
I have perfected my “I’m feeling super uncomfortable laugh” when in a business meeting after being asked:
– Do you have a boyfriend?
– You have such pretty eyes.
– Your hair looks nice.
– Come on, why don’t you just have a drink?
– Etc.
Or whatever random compliment about my physical appearance takes place, checking you out glance or “didn’t mean to touch you” brush against me, where you knew they meant to touch you EXACTLY that way.
Remember I’m in a business meeting, and NOT ON A DATE!
I always wondered how often this scenario happened with women in power?
Do they act the same way?
Is it the disease of power we are dealing with here?
Because we are dealing with an epidemic!
I do hope this conversation about Hollywood gives rise to other women speaking out about what they’ve seen and FELT while climbing the ladder of success.
The ladder which we’ve been told has a glass ceiling, which in fact is not glass, but more like a creepy power hungry person who knows what they can get away with……(use your imagination).
For all the women that I know and love, please speak up, no matter what industry you’re in. What have you experienced?
For all the men who have heeded your professional boundaries, I thank you!